FIGURING MYSELF OUT 7
I'm building a new world for myself. A world where I'm capable of doing a few things good than one thing best, hence living up to my name. You remember the quite where it says: A jack of all trades and a master of one. It doesn't really end there. The whole quite is this.
"A jack of all trades but a master of none, is better than the master of one."
The fact that it synchronises with my name without any effort is the only gift I have received without doing anything. All the more reason, right? So yeah, I'm trying to do a few things that I know, with time, I can be good at.
When I was a kid, things came easy to me. I could study with my dad a certain amount and be in the top 3 students in class, I would play outside for an hour and I'd be super fit and healthy(though I played a lot more, to the point of having fever every other day), and I'd eat well, so no particular deficiencies. My body and my mind were, as you can say, in optimal condition.
As I grew up and began to do things on my own, I stumbled a little bit. I was fourteen and for the first time I studied on my own that year. Dad wanted to let me do it on my own and as you'd expect, my scores plummeted. Dad picked up the studying portion up again so next year I did better easily. Then a few things changed.
My school changed and I had to learn new ways to learn. The old teaching method wasn't gonna work anymore. Dad knew it, and I had prior practice on how to study myself, so I took it upon myself. Add to studying, I had to adjust to a new life in the new school, and make friends, and be friends with teachers as well, and be present in sports as well.
I managed to do it all, my scores were satisfactorily good, I had good rapport with teachers, had a bunch of really good friends and I was above average in games as well.
Over the years, this is how I have been. Doing a set of things instead of doing one thing only. And I guess the society of today, the generation of today, the market of today rewards jack of all trades as much as the master of one, if not more. Most probably, more.
Since I've grown into doing these things and not focus on just one thing, I'd still love to do it, even though things are getting larger the older I'm getting. I recently turned 25 and I know everything I try to do will take atleast two years to develop itself to a satisfactory level. And so I have to wait for it all to work. It doesn't come easy though.
People I love and value sometimes feel I'm doing nothing, because it seems so. Results are usually nowhere to be seen for more than a year and at a time where I should be producing result after result(according to societal standards and standards of the previous generation) I'm going dry here. So, people who trust me sometimes begin losing faith.
Well, it is obvious. And it's new for me. The best way I've come to deal with it is transparent communication. Well, as transparent as I can be. I can't tell them everyday whether I'm growing or I'm losing out today. I have to take care of myself too, prevent myself from getting sick, staying on my toes, and staying calm as well in the midst of crippling anxiety and a still ongoing pandemic.
As much as the older generation says it understands, they can't. They didn't face a pandemic. They faced epidemics and that's similar but not exactly. We are in a completely different generation. And we will live differently. Yes, the classical ways of living work well, being really good at one thing, getting one stable job and living out the whole life this way, but I feel my way of living life is more exciting.
I guess i go by another quote alongside the quote I mentioned earlier: Life is meant to be lived. And, in short, all I'm doing is trying to find an optimal balance in these quotes. That's how I will live my life. That's how I will stay happy.
